My nephew sketched this picture of Robin Williams yesterday and posted it on Facebook. He really captured his eyes. I feel for Robin’s family but I also feel for the 108 other families whose loved one killed themselves that day as well, and the next day and today.
As you watched Robin Williams perform, he was always on. He was manic. Now, imagine if he was that high, how low his lows were. Look at his performances. Go back and look at his eyes. They tell the story of someone who hurts so deep inside. I can only imagine how hard he had to battle. Most people who are Bipolar whose highs and lows are so dramatic do not survive as long as he did. Look at the statistics. He was waging a huge battle within himself. I have no doubt that he made several attempts at taking his life. The suffering is immense. I should know.
I hurt for him because I know how hard he suffered and how hard he battled everyday the demons that were waging war in his mind. I know his loved ones wanted to take that pain away. Medications only do so much. I don’t know his story and whether he was ever on any medication but I bet he went off them often. He would never have been able to be as creative as he was if he were on his meds. That is a problem with Bipolar Disorder. It effects so many creative people and the meds dampen that creativity and so they go off the meds because they get it back. But the draw back is the lows and that is when the crises happen.
If you have a loved one who battles this disorder you are in for a challenge. Somedays it is like watching a train wreck. Your patience with them can last only so long. I don’t have the answers and my poor husband doesn’t always. But I know that he loves me and I love my children and that gets me through the bad days even if I just want to lay in bed. Some days I have to do just. I have to give myself a day of rest and trudge on through the lows the best I know how.
This is a sad post I know but it is a tragedy to lose a loved one this way. Remember Robin and pray for all of those who are suffering today and everyday. Pray for those 108 people who took their lives today and every day.